6...

So... It's been one hell of a week. I can't describe how busy and hectic my life has been recently. On the plus side though, it is all for the better. I have made a fair amount of bold moves and decisions which will have affected my life professionally and personally. 


I'm obviously not going to go into specifics, it's not right to do so publicly but the main bold move in my life this week is that I have left the job I loved for another opportunity. The fact is that my old job was not enough money, and if I could've taken my fellow managers with me I would. They are two of the greatest people I have ever known and am privileged to call them my friends. It was such a lovely little place to work but sometimes, I've learnt, in life you have to be a little bit selfish. It pays to be selfish- BUT NOT ALL THE TIME. I had to think about my finances, my independence and most importantly my pride.

I am returning to an old job, but in a different department. The reasons for this decision is again not for here but even though I am going back to similar circumstances I can't help but be extremely worried. I'm worried about what people think of me, I'm worried about people judging me and I'm worried about seeing certain people again as I haven't, and can't right now, physically prepare myself for that. I don't want to be someone who can't make their mind up all the time and come begging; I am not that type of person. 

If you may or may not have guessed by now, I worry way too much and my paranoia takes the better of me most of the time. My biggest fault is that I assume the worst in everything when it comes to my life. The last year or so has been the worst and best time. Literally; could not be more of an extreme year. 2013 was the worst year of my life. Fact. If I can achieve anything from this blog, it is to make sure I don't do this crap anymore; it's the main reason I get down so much. 

I am such a positive person when it comes to other people and their lives, so why can't I be like that with mine? If anybody can offer me tips then that would be awesome. I need to admit that there are some things I can't do completely on my own, I need someone else to help out here and there. Maybe it's time to start working out when that's the case. Let's see...

Here goes nothing...